Happy Mother's Day

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I am holding on. I found that I really cannot do it all.  Silly me at 45 thinking that I could somehow manage to. I’ve fallen many times, but I still keep striving to get it all done.

 

The first year is always the hardest year when opening up any shop. Thankfully that is behind us - we are breaking even (yeah!!!).  

 

Resilience is a process. It builds up over time.  My family is in the midst of preparing to move while I continue to be the boss lady of 2 companies, a mom, a wife, a sibling, a friend… All of these things in combination have forced me to be resilient.  I have also moved over a dozen times in my life so I’m going to handle it! My kids are up for the challenge as well and shifting the situation from sad to exciting.

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But I can’t always fall back on that resilience - it’s exhausting to maintain strength.  So we are going to reel it all in and try to live a happier life together with fewer obstacles.  There will be more stress ahead as moving can be out of control, and I am a person who needs to have some semblance of the elusive control thing.  But I have a cure all for these tests. Madigan and Hank.

No matter how much shit I step in, they are my everything - my push to move forward because nothing matters when they express their love to “the mamma” - that’s me, and my reason for being.  Two anecdotes as of late which perfectly illustrate their personalities and tickle me are the following.

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Madigan “Mom, you tell me you love me so often that one day it might just lose it’s effectiveness.”  I laughed so hard - she is right! Every opportunity I get I tell her I love her so much - I mean, there’s no denying it… I love her with all that I have, so effective or not I can’t stop.  Won’t stop. Sorry not sorry.  

And then Hank… this kid.  I dropped him off at school this morning and headed to work.  I was doing my morning routine and I don’t put my ringer on until I am sat down to properly be able to take and make calls.  Unfortunately I missed one important one. The Principle even texted me to tell me that Hank really wanted to talk to me. It was 8 minutes from the time she texted to the time I called back - an eternity!  Nobody knew what was wrong. When Hank picked up my return phone call he told me that he needed to tell me something but that I drove off too fast for him to get it out. I asked him what was going on and he whispered “I love you.” That was it and it was so important to both of us.   

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It is always a Happy Mother’s Day for me, and for all you mothers out there - breathe it in - you are loved.

P. S. While preparing for this move, I found this Mother’s Day card from Madigan, age 5.